Life in four suitcases.

Hello!

I am back here after a long time and this is first time I am writing in this New year 2013.
Well, where was I? I was not very far from Internet but did not felt to write here among lots of things going between December 2012 and March 2013.

Its been two months since we came to Linkoping, Sweden from India, from our home in Noida to a new home here.

From the time we took decision to move out of India suddenly life became very busy, busy in planning various things or I should say it got busy in planning to take our married life in four suitcases that to with the weight limit put by International airlines.

Its strange to realise that life can be moved around in any corner of the world with just four suitcases and yes we moved from one part of world to an another part of world. Its just not moving, its a change of culture, change of language, change of weather, change of environment, change of lifestyle but fortunately no change in food in big manner.

So, we are now kind of settle here but still in planning mode i.e. when we were in India we were planning on how to rearrange or sell our house hold stuff and now we are here so we are planning which household stuff to buy and when. So, this planning mode is going on right from the day we got our Visa to Sweden.

One of the strange thing is that when you are in same country with your family then you don’t interact very frequently but when you go out of country then interaction becomes quite frequent. Till the time I was in Noida My father never did interaction with Whatsapp or Skype  but now these applications are boon to us. Yahan aakar ghar waalon se itni baat hoti he jitni kabhi India me nahin hoti thi. Mom and Dad have become now Skype and Whatsapp experts.

So, things will go on like this till the time we are here, the day we will decide to go back to India I know we will again end up in just four suitcases.

Wo ek dialogue he na kisi film me “Ghar kya he? Jahan aapki family or parivaar ek jagah rehna shuru kar de wohi Ghar he chahe wo kahin bhi ho…. makaan ghar ban hi jaata he”

Lady In The Gogs 2

Lady in the Gogs -part2 continues from one of my post Lady in the Gogs in 2010.

So, what exactly happens when a beautiful lady or a pretty girl gets settle in the team? Does the fellow team mates keep doing their work normally? Do they notice the addition in team? Does any change occurs in the work atmosphere?

Well, I guess you will not feel any difficulty to answer these questions if you are working under an IT firm. Being working in an IT firm I have my observations for above questions and also the experiences as shared by other IT friends so generally what happens is:-

The girl joins the firm or moved in your team from some other team, the moment team get the news of new member’s arrival  everyone starts looking for the empty bench which may get allotted to her and then start envying those lucky team members around that empty bench as they are going to be her so called neighbors. Suddenly this stupid empty bench seems lucky to the people around it as everyone want to be a good neighbor and these people gets the reward of “getting more chances to talk to her” as luckiest draw reward.(Why not lucky draw? Keep on reading…)

Yes, that’s true, people around New Member in Team get more chances to talk as compared to others as these are the people who help the NMT in setting up network related things and other knowhow of team related things.

Once the luckiest team mates are identified then comes the turn of lucky team mate in form a very sweet term of IT “Buddy” or “Mentor”. A Buddy or a Mentor is that person who is responsible for sharing the knowledge of project related things and organizational related things to the NMT. Buddy/Mentor can be any one from the team who has the full of knowledge of project, so, the Mentor will mostly interact with the NMT till the moment NMT is comfortable in the project. After this, NMT is assigned to project activities and usual office life starts.

You know, one of the main and important ingredient in the making of any software is nicotine or caffeine, without it it may not have been developed. Ab software develop karne waala bhi insaan hi he and bina coffee,chai and sutte k to dimaag hi nahin chalta so ye hua na main and important ingredient!! J. So, everybody goes out from the office (kyunki office me installed vending machine ki chai me wo baat kahan aati he….) to have a cup of tea, coffee or sutta (Cigi aka Cigarette) and wouldn’t it be rude to not to ask the NMT for the Nicot/Cafeine breaks J, after all it makes other people envy when they see that pretty NMT with you or your group. <Same goes for lunch as well>

One can easily observe a change in the work atmosphere after the addition of NMT on the floor, kaise? Aise:-

 1. More people can be seen walking, most of the time with their water bottle to refill or with a cup of tea/coffee from the break out area.

 2. Frequency of technical discussions around the NMT increases.

 3. Friends of other team members around NMT start visiting them often for any reason and interestingly they do ask “kya baat aaj aayi nahin?” when the NMT do not comes to office.

As the time passes the NMT becomes old member in the team but the atmosphere around her (like strong fragrances of perfume/deodorants and things mentioned above) still exists. Colleagues become office friends, phone number and personal email ids gets exchanged followed by adding one more member in each other’s friend list on social networks, sometimes a love story happens and sometimes FOSLA (in case if you forgot the full form of it, it is Frustrated One Sided Lover’s Association) group welcomes their new member.

Whatever the case may be the story ends either with a sweet@my desk or with a Good Bye mail.

PS: I could have mentioned other things too when a Lady in the Gogs settles down in the team but I think this may get wacky on the public forum. If you really want to know those things then drop me a PM.

PPS: Aww! I just realized , this is my 100^th post on my blog. I have hit a century since 2008. :)

               

Busy!!

Heya!!

Life is going super busy these days, I have hardly logged in to my account since my last post. Will Catch up soon.

Keep Rocking!

-Ankit

Jaaaabooooong

From quite a long time I was planning to surprise Palak with some unexpected gift without any occasion and I was wondering how should I do it. Initially I thought to go on some online website and order something online and  get it deliver at home but then the *typical thinking of not doing trust* on websites which sell products overshadowed my plan.

*Typical thinking of not doing trust means ki 

-pta nahin jo product website pe dikha rahe hein waise hi deliver karenge ya nahin, 
-kya pta paise to le lein but time pe deliver karenge ya nahin, 
-Deliver karenge bhi ya nahin,
- Agar product defective ya fit nahin aaya to main kahan tak inke peeche bhagunga to return it or get it exchange,
- Website waale 30 days return policy kehte to he but phir us time ko courier karne ke paise bharo.

I have to have gift her something secretly and I was wondering whether should I go to the mall chupke se with out her knowledge and bring something for her but then suddenly advertisement of www.Jabong.com flashed in to my mind in which a man was hiding in some closet and told that Jabong.com offers cash on delivery(COD), Free delivery and 30 days return policy for free with full money return on no question basis (i.e. you do not have to pack the received item and take it to courier company to send it to office of Jabong.com on your expense, you just need to call their customer care and tell them that you need to return the ordered item, their pick up executive will come at your door step and take your item for return).

If you are getting such services at your door step then is there any need to move your ass out of your comfort zone? Simply click karo, order karo and ghar bethe apne man chaha item pao. This is provided by www.jabong.com

I changed my mind and I took the initiative to change my thinking towards e shopping by giving it a try and I ordered a pair of bellies for her from the wide variety and range offered by Jabong.com. The order got delivered with in one day may be because it got delivered from Gurgaon and the distance from Gurgaon to Noida is short, the quality and packing of the box was good

and when she opened above packing and saw her pretty bellies she literally did Whoaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! like the girl did in the Jabong.com's advertisement.

Websites like www.jabong.com are making people to buy those things which are not available in the markets of their city. This websites is helpful for people in small cities and small town to purchase things which they have not seen in their neighborhood and of course the people in big cities are enjoying these services without leaving their comfort zone.

I think its time when you can make your near and dear one do Whoaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!

Ye Software kya he? Hota kya he ye?... Some Myths about IT Industry.

Ek baat batao, ye software kya he? Matlab hota kya he ye software?

Very logical question but how many time you have come across this question and have you answered this question and succeeded to make other person understand what is a software ?

Once you answer above question next comes what software does your company make?

Again a very logical and layman question but I think this one is more easy then the first one, isn’t it?

Coming across non-IT friends, relatives, strangers  you will notice that the moment you say that you are an IT guy, they have already made some assumptions about you which are some myths and some actuality. Some of the common myths which I come across are:-

Myth #1: If you haven't been onsite you are a loser.

Uncle:     Tum 3 saal se IT company mein kaam kar rahe ho na?
Me:           Ji uncle.
Uncle:     Tum videsh nahi gaye?
Me:           Nahi uncle project mein requirement nahi  hai onsite ki
Uncle:     Lekin woh Mahesh ko toh maanna padegaa.... vo chote sheher se hai..... aise hi kisi private 
                  college se degree ki and then job me usne jamke mehnat ki aur use company ne  USA bheja!   
                  Mehnat ka fal use mila he.

Hmmm!! That’s the problem. People think about software industry that the one who is smart and hard working are sent on site while the loser ones are the people left behind in India. So, the assumption is that if you haven't been on site then you don't work hard nor you have any kind of sincerity and.…. bas abhi k liye itna kaafi he :)

Myth #2: If you are not working under a big IT name you are a loser.

Auntyji:  Beta kya kaam karte ho? 

Me:       Aunty main Software company me kaam karta hoon?

Auntyji : Accha!! Beta, kaunsi company me?

Me:          Ji Aunty!! Main <company name> is company me kaam karta hoon.

Auntyji: Ye kaun si company he? Kabhi suna nahi? Kaha hai  ye? 
(Embarrassing me and asking all this as if she knows all things about software companies)

Me:           Ji Aunty, Ye….
Auntyji:  Tumko TCS/Wipro ya Infosys mein nahi mila kya? (In short: you are a dumb ass) 

After that I have to make efforts to tell them how I actually work in a much niche technology. In case the opposite person is technologically insane then I give him some product development 'funda' with my arrogance.

Myth #3: If you are an IT guy then you can fix any computer, calculator and may be clocks too.

 Friend:     Bhai, tu ek din ghar aaja, mere computer me kuch kharabi ho gayi he, tu dekh 

                   le.

Me:           Bhai, usme me kya dekhunga?

Friend:     Abey!! Tu to software company me kaam karta he aur tu aise keh rha he, tujhe 

                  nahin pta hoga to aur kise pta hoga?

Me:           Bhai, hardware related problem hogi to main kahan se dekhunga, I am not 

                  hardware expert…. Haan agar kuch settings related problem he to bta.

Friend:     Yaar  mujhe nahin pta tu kya bol rha he…tu ek baar aaja.

Well, actually I enjoy fixing things but most of the IT guys around must have at least faced a situation where a friend asked him to fix his /her comp. The task can be from installing a software (double click, next, next, finish) to fixing a computer which gives electric shocks when its metal areas are touched.

Myth #4:  Working in IT, you have lots of money.

Once my parents went to a family friend’s house at evening tea and there
Auntyji:     aur Bhabhiji, bête ne car le legi ho ab to?

Mom:        arey bhabhiji!! Kahan abhi car lega wo…. Hum to soch rahe hein uski bike 

                   bhijwa de wahan… public transport se travel karne badi dikkatein he 

                   Delhi/Noida me. 

Auntyji:     arey kya baat kar rahe ho aap. Aapka beta to Software company me kaam 

                   karta he… wo chahe to aapko car dila dey and aap usko uski purani bike bhejne 

                   ki baat kar rahe ho.

Mom:        Arey nahin, aisa nahin he…abhi to use job karte hue 2 saal hi hue hein… 

Ab who is going to tell them ki bete ki apni salary me se abhi bike khareedne ki aukat nahin he aur ye car ki baat kar rahe hein.

Myth #5:  Software job means a job in comfort.

Non IT people:   Arey!! Ye software company ka job mast hota he re. Pure din Air Conditioned me bethe raho aaram se aur computer pe chick chick karte raho (people sit nicely in front of computer and just punch the keys)

Well I don't completely disagree khaas tor se in summer season: D

Myth #6: You are working in Software company so get married.

Old people:     Arey ab to badiya kama rha he computer ki naukri me…ab iski shaadi kar 

                         do!!

Ek mahine ki salary akele insaan ka kharcha nahin nikalta, do log kahan se khayenge? J

Myth #7: Your office is more like a factory

People from different field (PFDF)

PFDF:     Kahan he tumhari factory?

Me:         Factory???

PFDF:    haan!! Factory, jahan tum jaate ho software banane.

Me:        Sector 59, Noida me.

PFDF:    Accha!! Naveda me he, kitne mazdoor he tumhari factory me?

Me:        honge karib 1000-1200 k aas pass

PFDF:    Arey!! Itne saare mazdoor tab to bahut badi hogi tumahri factory.

Me:        haan!!

PFDF:    Itne saare log lagein hein yo ek software banane me?

Me:        haan (jhooth bolne me bhalai he nahin to samjhane me dimaag phat jayega)

It looks weird to refer a software office as a factory but logically dekha jaaye to thik bhi he and hum log hein to mazdoor hi bas difference itna he ki we do mazdoori in air conditioned environment while other mazdoor do it in natural environment.

Myth #8: You know everybody in your office.

When you tell anybody that you work with XYZ Company, often you get a reply “My son/daughter/relative Mr/Ms XXX also works in ABC. Do you know him/her"? If you answer in the negative, they feel disappointed.

It is difficult to explain them that there are around thousands of employees in my company, and I cannot know everybody in my ODC, forget about knowing everybody in the company.

I hope most of you have come across these situations and many more such myths.

_______________________________________________________________

PS: Software: Computer software, or just software, is a collection of computer programs and related data that provides the instructions for telling a computer what to do and how to do it. Software refers to one or more computer programs and data held in the storage of the computer for some reasons.

Kuch doubt he to yaar Wikipedia se pooch lo ya google kar lo :)

Honesty is the best policy

Kuch yaad aaya?? Yahi sikhate tha school me "Honesty is the best policy and we should never lie". Do you think we are following this slogan completely?

Some people say that they hate those who tell lies for any reason while some other people accept “white lies” when situation arises, even if they usually do not like lying. Well, I guess many of us are like that.

During our childhood, our parents teach us one of the greatest human values: always telling the truth. Based on this, parents can help us resolve life problems, and we build a strong familial relationship with them. For example, lying or omitting the truth towards our parents can leads us getting in trouble or even in life threatening situations. Sometimes might be too late for them to help us, even if they try hard to do as much as possible to get us out of the problems.
Today, we are sometimes honest and sometimes we take help of white lies to escape from an unwanted situation. Wo kehte he na ki "jis jhooth se kisi ka bhala ho ya nuksaan na ho use jhooth nahin kehte". Ab kya karein!!! har kisi ko har time sach bhi to nahin bol sakte.... arey bhai zamana hi aisa he and according to Raju of 3 idiots "jhooth bolna bhi to hume parents and is duniya ne sikhaya he".

Being an honest person is awfully significant in any long term relationship, such as a friendship or a marriage relation. We want our life partner and friends to be truthful to us but when our turn comes we never hesitate to throw a believable white lie. Office ke baad booze party me jaana he to wife ko bol do "Yaar, aaj thoda time lagega office me. Thoda kaam aa gya he :)" ya phir apne friend k saath na jaana ho to "yaar, thoda kaam  he mujhe aur tabiyat bhi thik nahin lag rahi he, tu samajhna".

Actually, we all have classified certain areas where we have to be honest and where we have to lie (a lie which does not harm anyone or may be gives some advantage with out hurting anyone) like:-

1. We are honest to our life partner and immediate family members but not completely with relatives (Haye haye....rishtedaaro ki nazar lag gayi to!!).

2. We must be honest to our employer but its okay to lie (white/black) to the client to win something.(However the later part remains correct always but are we sure about the first part? :))

3. We always do some jugaad in investment proofs while paying and filing Income tax return. (Ab itne bade bade ghotale hote he humare yahan...humne 20,30 hazaar ka ghotla kar liya to kya fark padta he, kyun!! he na?)

4. We the people who are slaves of private organizations are honest while applying for leaves but it's okay to bunk office once in a while with an absurd reason. (Ab, ye to chalta he yaar.... hum aur kya karein agar office se chutti nahin milti to..)

5. We are honest to traffic police when we have full papers of vehicle but its okay to slip Gandhiji if we get caught with incomplete papers. (Majboori ka naam Mahtma Gandhi)

6. We are honest and in our limits when we go to USA, Europe or on any other overseas location but its okay to blend things in our own country. (Actually, bahar k strict rules se phat ti he na hum logo ki.... yahan kuch kiya to saale fine laga denge ya seedha andar :D)

"Mera bharat mahaan, sau me se assi baimaan" seems we have to  live like this.So, I feel the definition of slogan "Honesty is the best policy" is changed. Honesty may not be the best policy but it does not ensure that being honest will not trouble you.

Baarish ki kich kich...

"5 minutes of heavy rain turned Noida/Delhi in to Venice.....arey koi boat lao, mujhe office jana he..."

This was my statement few days back on Facebook and I think this should be for the next few days if it continues to rain like this.

Generally, baarish ho rahi he isse koi farak nahin padta but it surely gives a moment to think when it is raining either at the time of going to work or at the time of returning from work.

Jo bhi ho, office to jaane hi he, office se jaana bhi he and in all this kich kich pich pich everybody wants to reach their destination asap which sometimes results in traffic jams and making all late. Sometimes people are not able to reach office on time to attend conference call with the overseas client. I hope ki aisa ho sakta --------------------->

Thanks to our drainage systems designed by intellect authorities which makes roads to get disappear under water and show us that there are no signs of drought anywhere. People who walk on road feels that they are in some water amusement park due to the frequent splashes of water coming on them from the vehicles coming in high speed in those flooded roads.

Interesting thing is to know what different people thinks on a rainy day:-

Four wheeler users: if they have a two wheeler then they could have commuted by it using a raincoat and avoided all these traffic chaos.

Two wheeler users: if they have a four wheeler then they could have commuted by it, ye raincoat and udte hue kichad se chutkara milta.

Bicycle users: I am fine with it, at least I can hold umbrella in one hand and still drive my bicycle.

Pedestrian: Getting on to a bicycle to reach early to work.

Traffic police: Chodna!! kaun saala baarish me khade ho kar bheegega.... traffic ki maa behen ek hoti he to hone do... baad me dekh lenge.

Office Shuttle driver: Ye bikers raincoat pehen kar to sukhe sukhe aa jaate hein aur phir humari gaadi ki seat ko geela kar dete hein... unke baad aana waala employee hum par chillata he ki seat gili kyun he.

Road side Sabzi Wale: Hey Bhagwaan, ye baarish kab thamegi, kab humari sabzi bikegi.

People frustrated from traffic jams: 

Ye Noida me auto waalo ko half kar dena 
chahiye, saara traffic inhi ki wajah se hota he... ye aadhe kam ho jayenge to traffic sudhar jayega (They don't bother about 
people who don't have their own vehicle).
Log public transport kyun nahin use karte
yaar, kuch to traffic kam ho. 








Employees: It's better to inform the boss that I will get late for office due to this fucking traffic jam.

Home less people: Ab kahan sir chupau, kahan jaun.

Lovers: "Dekho baarish ho rahi he...mera dil ro raha he..." and other romantic songs :)

Alcohol lovers: Arey yaar, aaj phir mahol ban gya he peene waala....mausam mast he.. chalein kya!!

There may be lots of other things too,Kher jo bhi ho, once we reach our destination after experiencing the natural shower adrak waali chai and garma garam pakode to chal hi jaate hein.